1. Horse And Woman
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| galloping horse www.clipartpal.com |
"They say a spirited horse and a headstrong woman both require a tight rein and proper sandbagging. If you lose your grip for even a second, they’ll both bolt into the sunset—the only difference is, the woman runs twice as fast and takes half your stuff with her."
ooo
2. A married man's lament:
The Moonlight: I never truly understood its ethereal glow until I looked upon her serene face.
The Doe: I never knew the meaning of captive innocence until I gazed into her bright, soulful eyes.
The Symphony: I never felt true euphoria until she smiled like a blossoming flower and spoke to me with the tenderness of a heavenly angel.
The Volcano: ...And then, just for a laugh, I casually mentioned that the girl next door was quite attractive.
When I told her the girl across the house was beautiful (just for fun), I never saw and experienced until she frowned and exploded on me with a powder-keg temper. Now I feel like an helpless man, standing before a Chinese dragon, spewing out fire and brimstones.
Goodbye George, now I am heading to an Himalayan cave to become a saint to get freedom and salvation through meditation.
ooo
3. The Intern’s Gripe
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| Watergate Cartoon WatergateCartoon.fold3.com |
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| Interview with David Frost 1977Former US Prez Nixon writingisfun-damental.co |
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| Ex US President Richard Nixon & watergate scandal, cagle.com |
"Professor, if you've forced me to choose between being a bouncer at a top-less joint or an intern for a foxy, silver-tongued politician of the Richard Nixon variety, I’d choose the job at a topless club; the bouncing is honest work. I want to travel to Washington to learn the nuances of public administration, not the fundamentals of advanced racketeering and dishonesty. Working for a crook doesn't teach you how to govern—it just teaches you how to shred documents. I mean I learn nothing"
ooo
4. Hell
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| Hell for cheats.www.toonpool.com |
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| VIP hell. www.cartoonmovement.com |
The Pulpit of Purgatory: Hell is a place where ever-yapping evangelists and hypocritical street preachers are forced to pull up a chair, sit in eternal silence, and literally swallow every single word of fire and brimstone they weaponized on earth.
The Legislative Wing: Hell is a place where corrupt politicians gather in subterranean back rooms to obsess over legislative quorums, brainstorm quick-buck schemes, and trade blueprints for lavish summer mansions funded entirely by the boodles and bribes they embezzled during their terms.
The VIP Lounge: Hell is where mad mothers-in-law and transvestites finally form a unified caucus, weeping over their earthly sins while realizing nobody is listening to them anymore.
ooo
5. Hangman And Judge |
| funny, Bad Judge picture, cartoonstock.com |
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| www.jantoo.com |
"Once etched by the power above, man's destiny or "Karma" can not be rewritten or overridden. It is God's edit ! He, who is to be a judge (let him be a hanging judge or a biased judge) by profession in a court of law, can never be an hangman in the gallows. By the same token he, who is to be shot dead, can never be choked to death on a piece of fish bone."
6. Out of Shape
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| too much taking cartoonstock.com |
"If you ever let a piece of information pass through so many people, at the receiving end it will become garbled, twisted, stunted and finally almost out of shape. If passed on through a series yapping people, at the end, the information will become a lump of clay or pulp."
ooo
7. Brooding over Past Horrors
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| slapstick www. promenademusic.co.uk |
ooo
Note: Many of the posts on Quotes for Life,Funny Quotes and Humor were published some years ago and I repost them one by one now on after update and correction.
The funny quotes presented above are meant for pondering, laughter and fun only. Unless and otherwise authors' names are mentioned, the quotes are mine and are not meant to hurt any person. Image credit goes to respective cartoonist and media mentioned there under ......Author
